Deshoda » Words

Smoking Etiquette

Shonari — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 13:45:39 +0000

The person who rolls the joint (no matter whose weed it is) gets to spark up the joint and get first hits…
If someone rolls a nice joint, its good to give the person a complement on his rolling skills…
If someone starts hogging the bowl and starts using the excuse that it’s okay for him to hog it since it’s his weed, this is definitely not cool.
The punishment depends on the quality of the weed and how much he put in. (if it was real crappy and he was real cheap with it, then you bug on the person and rag on him
If someone is too palsy to light the bowl (due to being too stoned or the person is just a retard then they must relinquish control of the lighter to someone more able to get it lit. –this does NOT mean the person who lights gets free hits… this privilege tends to get abused (“hey lemme light it for you…”)
If someone is so much of a palsy that they blow INTO the bowl and blow all the shit on the floor, this person must be ragged on and the person cant smoke on the next round (unless it was his stuff)
If you smoke with someone in your house, you should let them eat some munchy food you may have lying around.. don’t be cheap with your food if you have food…
If someone who’s smoked asks for a sip of your soda, you must give him some… (dry mouth is not fun)
Converse of (7); if you ask for a sip, don’t take a large gulp
If smoking from a bong or a joint, never put the whole thing in your mouth and get it all sopping wet.. its disgusting and it messed up the joint.
If you’re smoking from a bong and these not enough in the bowl for a whole other hit, you should save the smoke in the chamber for the next person… (don’t let go of the ‘carb’ and take it all yourself)
Puff Puff Pass
Never bitch about someone else’s weed being no good! If you don’t like it don’t smoke it!
If a friend gets you high sometime in the future you need to get that friend high
Thou shalt not turn down a smoke. Never!
If you buy weed from a friend or a friend of a friend, it is polite to roll a joint, (a small one, if you wish) and smoke with the person who sells you the stuff.
It is very impolite to hand someone an empty bowl, without notifying that person of it’s possible cashed-ness. A proper warning would be ‘Here ya go…I think it might be cashed.
The person who fills the bowl is given the opportunity to take the first hit. It doesn’t matter whose bowl it is.
Always remember to thank a person who has gotten you high. I know it sounds silly, but I know people who never say thanks and it gets a little annoying.
The person who brought the bud picks the music.
When using a bong, don’t slobber all over it.
Again, when using a bong, DON’T blow out the ashes, unless that’s what the “homeowner” does.
NEVER go to someone’s house EXPECTING them to catch you a buzz. Of course, there are exceptions to this rule…
If you spill the bong, clean it up! (And don’t forget to put water back in it!!)

Roach Rules

————

When the roach gets too small, if someone has a problem with it, it is common courtesy here to put the roach in a bowl and finish it that way… that way the people who don’t mind burning their fingers don’t get it all.
Whoever rolled the joint, got to light it and take the first puff. Then it just got passed on. Great fun when several were started at once and someone passed it the opposite direction to the others after lighting it….

31 Life Lessons

Shonari — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 14:12:08 +0000

1. Trust your gut. Really.

If you think he likes you, you’re probably right. If you think he’s cheating, you’re probably right. If you think she’s going to be your new BFF, (this time with feeling!) you’re probably right.

2. Sunscreen. Always.

SPF 15 indoors, SPF 30 outdoors. I’ve been wearing sunscreen everyday since I was 19 and I still get carded. I think this actually has more to do with the bouncers hitting on me, but I’d like to share the credit with my good friend Oil of Olay daily moisturizing lotion with SPF.

3. If you’re lying in bed worrying about it, get up and write it down.

If I don’t do this, my night will quickly devolve into cyclical thoughts of doom and anxiety. Just get out of bed, write down the thing that you’re worried about, write down a few ideas to deal with it and then go the eff back to sleep.

4. Processed carbohydrates and sugars are yucky.

It’s not hard to switch to wholewheat bread and noodles or substitute honey/maple syrup/raw sugar for the white stuff. It’s yummy and you’ll feel heaps better!

5. Maintaining friendships (and making new friends) is an active process.

Stop waiting for them to call you! Think of something fun to do, call your friends and go do it. Also, stop sitting in your apartment, devotedly wishing that you knew more cool people. Surprisingly, this will not get you any closer to making new friends. Go places where like-minded people hang out, talk to new people at parties, initiate.

6. Uncomfortable underwear can ruin your day.

At least they can ruin mine. So don’t wear your sexy-times underwear on the day you have to walk ten blocks to work.

7. It really doesn’t matter what you major in.

What does matter? The internships you get, your work ethic, your interpersonal skills, who you know. So go ahead and get a BA in Studio Art! As long as you compliment that with work experience at a graphic design studio, a museum and an ad agency.

8. Create an active life style.

I don’t go to the gym every day. Or, um, ever in the summer. But I walk to work and to the market and just about everywhere within a 3 mile radius. If you make daily activity a habit, you won’t have nearly as many moments of “how did I inadvertently gain 30 pounds?!” or “why can’t I walk up a flight of stairs?!”

9. Learn to enjoy your own company

There will be times in your life when you really want to see that movie, check out that new boutique, go to Thailand and no one wants to go with you. Bummer! But that doesn’t mean that you can’t go by yourself and have a good time. Take baby steps and work up to doing the big stuff on your own.

10. Don’t allow outside sources to determine your self-esteem

I’m still working on this one. But I think it’s important to realize that just about everything in life is relative – depending on your surroundings, you could be the hottest/smartest/highest paid girl in the room. But if you walk next door? Maybe it’s different story. It’s important to have faith in your abilities and strong suits – regardless of how they compare to others.

11. Find out what colors and styles work (and don’t work) on you. Style accordingly.
I look good in gold and browns and corals. I look good with long, wavy hair. I look good in boat-neck, three quarter length tops. It took many, many unflattering photos to figure this out.

12. When in doubt, make the effort

You will never regret wearing that nice outfit, buying the thoughtful gift for the friend you haven’t heard from in a while, over-tipping. If it doesn’t work out, at least you’ll know you did your best.

13. Cook at home.

Seriously. You will save one million dollars. You will maintain a healthy weight. You will impress your friends.

14. There are 300 million people in America. And 6,000,000,000 in the world.

I promise you, you’ll love someone else. You’ll meet new friends. You’ll find co-workers and neighbors that are awesome. If it’s too hard (or if someone is making you feel bad) walk away. There are a million other people out there who won’t make you feel bad!

15. It’s easier to make money than memories

Are you throwing up in your mouth right now? I am, a little bit. But it’s true. Don’t take the extra shift at work and miss your friend’s awesome end-of-the summer barbecue. If all your friends are springing for a weekend at a cabin near the Canadian border, save up for a few weeks and make it happen. You won’t remember the two weeks of eating in and watching library dvds, but you’ll remember 3 days of fun with your buddies.

16. You can find common ground with just about anyone, any where

Regardless of a person’s gender, age, race or religion there are common denominators to the human experience – falling in love, being homesick, laughing at baby animals. You don’t even need to speak the same language to share an appreciation for these things. You’d be amazed how far you can get with most people just by smiling and asking them questions.

17. Don’t buy the cheapest version. Buy the second cheapest.

This trick has saved me a lot of money. And many hang overs. Usually the cheapest version of something (vodka, eye shadow, shoes) is noticeably dicey. But the second-cheapest? Not so bad!

18. Make an extra copy

Of your keys, your lease, your birth certificate, your social security card. Then give said copy to someone trust worthy.

19. Floss.

For realz. It’s pretty gratifying in a slightly disgusting way.

20. Consider second hand, for just about everything

98% of everything I own is second hand. My blow dryer, my picture frames, my sheets (not as gross as you’re imagining). They cost a fraction of what I’d pay for them new, and no one’s the wiser. At least until I tell the internet that I sleep on used sheets.

21. Excuses are embarrassing

With the exception of excuses like “my grandma died” most excuses are embarrassing for everyone involved – the person giving them and the person listening to them. ‘I just don’t know where to start,’ ‘I’m tired,’ ‘it’s too expensive’ really just translate to ‘I’m not making it a priority’. See? Embarrassing, right?

22. Don’t ask a question if you’re not prepared to hear the answer

If you ask your friend “Do I look fat in this?” you best be prepared to hear that it’s not a super flattering look on you. If you ask that guy you’ve been seeing for five months “Where do you see this going?” you need to know he might respond in stutters, back-pedaling and comments about “keeping it light.” Don’t ask if you don’t really, really want to know.

23. Engage in calculated risk taking

Dancing on the table, taking a spontaneous road trip by yourself to a neighboring state, trying a new type of ethnic food – it is unlikely that any of these things will kill you. But they will probably make you more interesting.

24. Learn how to live well within your means

Make a budget and stick to it. Pay off your credit cards every month. Learn to cook for yourself. Get a bike and use it (then you won’t need a gym membership or all that gas for you car!) Cancel the cable. Split internet with a neighbor. Consider second hand. You’d be amazed how painless saving money can be!

25. Learn some basic photo editing skills

Because that photo from your vacation would make a great Facebook profile photo if you didn’t have that giant zit, right? Photoscape, Picnik and Gimp are all great options!

26. If you don’t know what you say, silence is always an option

I learned this from my friend Ellie, who used this approach to deal with unruly patients during her years as a nurse in NYC. If someone says something you don’t like (and don’t know how to respond to) just stare at them and don’t say anything. Totally. terrifying. And totally effective!

27. If you don’t know, ask

Because that thing that people say about assuming (it makes an ass out of you and me)? That’s true.

28. Do something different with your weekends

After a week in the cubicle farm, I know it’s tempting to spend your weekend watching DVDs, running errands, going to house parties and nursing hangovers. But doing the same thing every weekend gets old. And you won’t return to work reinvigorated or inspired. You don’t have to do anything earth shattering – have a sleep over with old friends, go camping in a State Park, rent bikes and ride through your city, try a new ethnic restaurant, look up the top tourist sights in your city and check them out. Milk those two days off for all they’re worth!

29. Stay in touch

In the age of skype/facebook/texting there’s absolutely no reason that you can’t maintain regular contact with your childhood bestie or that cool girl from your freshman comp class. Maintaining and fostering friendships is super important. Also, you’ll have more couches to crash on when you go traveling!

30. Find a creative outlet

Most of us aren’t 100% creatively fulfilled by our day jobs. Even those of us who work in creative fields! Engaging different parts of your brain (and different parts of your personality) is hugely, hugely gratifying. Seriously, you cannot overestimate how having a good hobby can change your life. I’m not exaggerating when I tell you that after I started blogging, I needed less sleep and was a much happier person. Truth.

31. Act like you know what you’re doing

You can pretty much conquer the world with a confident walk, a well-thought-out outfit and confident demeanor. We teach people how to treat us and when you show people that you’re a force to be reckoned with, they’ll believe you.

Source: Yes and Yes

Ten best non-sex feelings ever

Shonari — Sun, 16 Oct 2011 17:24:05 +0000

The feeling you first wake up but don’t have to get out of bed yet.
Getting goosebumps from music/movie.
When you’re congested as fuck and then suddenly your nostrils open up.
Winning a prize/contest
A description that’s way too accurate for this time of the morning and that “vacated bowels” feeling you get after.
Thinking the cop behind you with his lights on is going to pull you over but then he passes you and you’re fine
Crushing my enemies, seeing them drive before me, and hearing their lamentations of their women.
Eating a good meal
Getting my hair shampooed/cut at a salon/barber.
When you finally get rid of that thing stuck in your teeth.

No One Wants to Die

Shonari — Fri, 14 Oct 2011 14:29:08 +0000

No one wants to die, even people who want to go to Heaven don’t want to die to get there, and yet, death is the destination we all share. No one has ever escaped it. And that is as it should be, because death is very likely the single best invention of life. It’s life’s change agent; it clears out the old to make way for the new. right now, the new is you. Right now, the new is you. But someday, not too long from now, you will gradually become the old and be cleared away. Sorry to be so dramatic, but it’s quite true. Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma, which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important have the courage to follow your own heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.

Author: Steve Jobs

This sentence has five words

Shonari — Thu, 13 Oct 2011 14:08:53 +0000

This sentence has five words. Here are five more words. Five-word sentences are fine. But several together become monotonous. Listen to what is happening. The writing is getting boring. The sound of it drones. It’s like a stuck record. The ear demands some variety. Now listen. I vary the sentence length, and I create music. Music. The writing sings. It has a pleasant rhythm, a lilt, a harmony. I use short sentences. And I use sentences of medium length. And sometimes, when I am certain the reader is rested, I will engage him with a sentence of considerable length, a sentence that burns with energy and builds with all the impetus of a crescendo, the roll of the drums, the crash of the cymbals–sounds that say listen to this, it is important.

Author: Gary Provost

Here’s to the Crazy Ones – Steve Jobs

Shonari — Fri, 07 Oct 2011 13:43:40 +0000

21 Suggestions for Success

Shonari — Sat, 10 Sep 2011 11:11:03 +0000

Marry the right person. This one decision will determine 90% of your happiness or misery.
Work at something you enjoy and that’s worthy of your time and talent.
Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.
Be forgiving of yourself and others.
Be generous.
Have a grateful heart.
Persistence, persistence, persistence.
Discipline yourself to save money on even the most modest salary.
Treat everyone you meet like you want to be treated.
Commit yourself to constant improvement.
Commit yourself to quality.
Understand that happiness is not based on possessions, power or prestige, but on relationships with people you love and respect.
Be loyal.
Be honest.
Be a self-starter.
Be decisive even if it means you’ll sometimes be wrong.
Stop blaming others. Take responsibility for every area of your life.
Be bold and courageous. When you look back on your life, you’ll regret the things you didn’t do more than the ones you did.
Take good care of those you love.
Don’t do anything that wouldn’t make your Mom proud

Google’s Corporate Philosophy

Shonari — Thu, 08 Sep 2011 20:06:01 +0000

Focus on the user and all else will follow.
It’s best to do one thing really, really well.
Fast is better than slow.
Democracy on the web works.
You don’t need to be at your desk to need an answer.
You can make money without doing evil.
There’s always more information out there.
The need for information crosses all borders.
You can be serious without a suit.
Great just isn’t good enough.

Life’s Instructions

Shonari — Tue, 06 Sep 2011 12:47:46 +0000

Have a firm handshake.
Look people in the eye.
Sing in the shower.
Own a great stereo system.
If in a fight, hit first and hit hard.
Keep secrets.
Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen everyday.
Always accept an outstretched hand.
Be brave. Even if you’re not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference.
Whistle.
Avoid sarcastic remarks.
Choose your life’s mate carefully. From this one decision will come 90 per cent of all your happiness or misery.
Make it a habit to do nice things for people who will never find out.
Lend only those books you never care to see again.
Never deprive someone of hope; it might be all that they have.
When playing games with children, let them win.
Give people a second chance, but not a third.
Be romantic.
Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.
Loosen up. Relax. Except for rare life-and-death matters, nothing is as important as it first seems.
Don’t allow the phone to interrupt important moments. It’s there for our convenience, not the caller’s.
Be a good loser.
Be a good winner.
Think twice before burdening a friend with a secret.
When someone hugs you, let them be the first to let go.
Be modest. A lot was accomplished before you were born.
Keep it simple.
Beware of the person who has nothing to lose.
Don’t burn bridges. You’ll be surprised how many times you have to cross the same river.
Live your life so that your epitaph could read, No Regrets
Be bold and courageous. When you look back on life, you’ll regret the
things you didn’t do more than the one’s you did.
Never waste an opportunity to tell someone you love them.
Remember no one makes it alone. Have a grateful heart and be quick to acknowledge those who helped you.
Take charge of your attitude. Don’t let someone else choose it for you.
Visit friends and relatives when they are in hospital; you need only stay a few minutes.
Begin each day with some of your favorite music.
Once in a while, take the scenic route.
Send a lot of Valentine cards. Sign them, ‘Someone who thinks you’re terrific.’
Answer the phone with enthusiasm and energy in your voice.
Keep a note pad and pencil on your bed-side table. Million-dollar ideas sometimes strike at 3 a.m.
Show respect for everyone who works for a living, regardless of how trivial their job.
Send your loved ones flowers. Think of a reason later.
Make someone’s day by paying the toll for the person in the car behind you.
Become someone’s hero.
Marry only for love.
Count your blessings.
Compliment the meal when you’re a guest in someone’s home.
Wave at the children on a school bus.
Remember that 80 per cent of the success in any job is based on your ability to deal with people.
Don’t expect life to be fair.

Source: Amazing Posts

100 Whimsical Words

Shonari — Tue, 06 Sep 2011 12:42:32 +0000

absquatulate: to flee, abscond
abstemious: restrained in consumption of food and alcohol
balderdash: nonsense
ballyhoo: commotion, hype
bindle stiff: hobo
bodacious: remarkable, voluptuous
borborygmus: sound of intestinal gas
cahoots (in the expression “in cahoots with”): scheming
callipygian: possessing a shapely derriere
cantankerous: irritating, difficult
carbuncle: pustule
caterwaul: to wail or protest noisily
cattywampus: in disarray
cockamamie (also cockamamie): ridiculous
comeuppance: just deserts
concupiscent: possessed of erotic desire
copacetic (also copasetic, copesetic): satisfactory
curmudgeon: ill-tempered (and often old) person
debauchery: sensual gratification
doohickey: gadget or attachment
effluvium: unpleasant smell
factotum: all-around servant or attendant
farrago: confused mixture
festoon: to decorate; dangling decorative chains
finagle: to trick
fisticuffs: fighting with fists
flabbergasted: dumbfounded
flagitious: villainous
flibbertigibbet: flighty person
flummoxed: confused
foible: fault
folderol: nonsense
foofaraw: flash, frills
fusty: moldy, musty, old-fashioned
gallimaufry: mixture, jumble
gallivant: to jaunt or carouse
gobbledygook: nonsense, indecipherable writing
haberdasher: men’s clothier; provider of sundries
harridan: shrewish woman
higgledy-piggledy: in a disorganized or confused manner
high jinks (also hijinks): boisterous antics
hodgepodge: mixture, jumble
hokum: nonsense
hoodwink: to deceive
hoosegow: jail
hornswoggle: to dupe or hoax
hortatory: advisory
hullabaloo: uproar
ignoramus: dunce
imbroglio: confused predicament
jackanapes: impudent or mischievous person
jiggery-pokery: deceit
kerfuffle: disturbance
lackadaisical: bereft of energy or enthusiasm
loggerheads (in the expression “at loggerheads”): quarrelsome
lollygag: to meander, delay
loquacious: talkative
louche: disreputable
lugubrious: mournful, dismal
malarkey (also malarky): nonsense
maleficence: evil
mendacious: deceptive
oaf: clumsy or stupid person
obfuscate: confuse, obscure
obloquy: condemning or abusive language, or the state of being subject to such
obsequious: flattering
orotund: sonorous, or pompous
osculate: to kiss
paroxysm: convulsion or outburst
peccadillo: minor offense
periwinkle: light purplish blue; creeping plant; aquatic snail
perspicacious: astute
pettifogger: quibbler; disreputable lawyer
poltroon: cowardly, coward
prognosticate: to predict
pusillanimous: cowardly
raffish: vulgar
ragamuffin: dirty, disheveled person
rambunctious: unruly
resplendent: brilliantly glowing
ribaldry: crude or coarse behavior
rigmarole (also rigamarole): confused talk; complicated procedure
ruckus: disturbance
scalawag: scamp
scofflaw: lawbreaker
shenanigans: tricks or mischief
skedaddle: flee
skulduggery: devious behavior
spiffy: stylish
squelch: to suppress or silence; act of silencing; sucking sound
subterfuge: deception, or deceptive ploy
supercilious: haughty
swashbuckler: cocky adventurer; story about the same
sylph: lithe woman
tatterdemalion: raggedly dressed person; looking disreputable or decayed
termagant: shrewish woman
whirligig: whirling toy; merry-go-round; dizzying course of events
widdershins (also withershins): counterclockwise, contrary
willy-nilly: by force, haphazardly

Source: Daily Writing Tips