Smoking Etiquette

  1. The person who rolls the joint (no matter whose weed it is) gets to spark up the joint and get first hits…
  2. If someone rolls a nice joint, its good to give the person a complement on his rolling skills…
  3. If someone starts hogging the bowl and starts using the excuse that it’s okay for him to hog it since it’s his weed, this is definitely not cool.
  4. The punishment depends on the quality of the weed and how much he put in. (if it was real crappy and he was real cheap with it, then you bug on the person and rag on him
  5. If someone is too palsy to light the bowl (due to being too stoned or the person is just a retard then they must relinquish control of the lighter to someone more able to get it lit.  –this does NOT mean the person who lights gets free hits… this privilege tends to get abused (“hey lemme light it for you…”)
  6. If someone is so much of a palsy that they blow INTO the bowl and blow all the shit on the floor, this person must be ragged on and the person cant smoke on the next round (unless it was his stuff)
  7. If you smoke with someone in your house, you should let them eat some munchy food you may have lying around.. don’t be cheap with your food if you have food…
  8. If someone who’s smoked asks for a sip of your soda, you must give him some… (dry mouth is not fun)
  9. Converse of (7); if you ask for a sip, don’t take a large gulp
  10. If smoking from a bong or a joint, never put the whole thing in your mouth and get it all sopping wet.. its disgusting and it messed up the joint.
  11. If you’re smoking from a bong and these not enough in the bowl for a whole other hit, you should save the smoke in the chamber for the next person… (don’t let go of the ‘carb’ and take it all yourself)
  12. Puff Puff Pass
  13. Never bitch about someone else’s weed being no good! If you don’t like it don’t smoke it!
  14. If a friend gets you high sometime in the future you need to get that friend high
  15. Thou shalt not turn down a smoke. Never!
  16. If you buy weed from a friend or a friend of a friend, it is polite to roll a joint, (a small one, if you wish) and smoke with the person who sells you the stuff.
  17. It is very impolite to hand someone an empty bowl, without notifying that person of it’s possible cashed-ness.  A proper warning would be ‘Here ya go…I think it might be cashed.
  18. The person who fills the bowl is given the opportunity to take the first hit.  It doesn’t matter whose bowl it is.
  19. Always remember to thank a person who has gotten you high.  I know it sounds silly, but I know people who never say thanks and it gets a little annoying.
  20. The person who brought the bud picks the music.
  21. When using a bong, don’t slobber all over it.
  22. Again, when using a bong, DON’T blow out the ashes, unless that’s what the “homeowner” does.
  23. NEVER go to someone’s house EXPECTING them to catch you a buzz.  Of course, there are exceptions to this rule…
  24. If you spill the bong, clean it up!  (And don’t forget to put water back in it!!)


Roach  Rules


  1. When the roach gets too small, if someone has a problem with it, it is common courtesy here to put the roach in a bowl and finish it that way… that way the people who don’t mind burning their fingers don’t get it all.
  2. Whoever rolled the joint, got to light it and take the first puff. Then it just got passed on. Great fun when several were started at once and someone passed it the opposite direction to the others after lighting it….


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  1. If you’re smoking with friends, don’t ignore them while you talk and text on your phone. Friends are there to talk to and have fun with.

  2. This is random, but how in the world are you writing and posting in August 2012? Are you a time traveler? 😉

  3. Sarai

    i am proud to say that before i read this i was already a polite smoker 😀

  4. all seems pretty obvious to me. some people definitely need this article tho lol

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